The Beast

It creeps up inside of you, clawing at your insides, stopping your breath, and rendering you frozen. It’s that feeling of complete and utter helplessness while your body fights to shut down. Nothing anyone can say or do can stop it. You cannot simply get rid of it; there is no easy way to slay this beast. It affects you every minute of every day and limits what you can accomplish. As hard as you try, there are some things that it just won’t let you do.

There are times when you don’t know when it’s going to strike. You could be going on with your day like everything is fine and then it rears its ugly head and stops you in your tracks. You can try to tame it; try to offer it comfort and there are times when it sticks. Other times it evolves into an even bigger beast and leaves you a wreck. You suffer from it and those around you suffer as a result. Simple everyday tasks are hindered by it. A moment can be fine, then the beast ruins it halfway through.

The beast has many ways to torture the host. There are times when it yanks on the brain causing the host’s head to hurt. Other times it pokes at your lungs, yanks on the stomach, or shakes the bladder. Perhaps its favorite pastime is whispering in the host’s ear. It whispers all kinds of horrors: every terrible scenario for every situation, the beast fills your ears with it.

Each beast is specific to its host. It feeds on the host’s every fear; it even heightens those fears and beats the host into submission. What tames the beast in one person won’t necessarily work on the other person; sometimes it even makes the beast madder. There are things that can shrink the beast, quell the beast, and turn the beast from the usual torture.

The beast never leaves you no matter how much you try. It can get lost in you; remain buried for long periods of time. Then it finds its way back up when you least expect it.